Reward yourself! That's what B.F. Skinner would say. His theory of operant conditioning supports the idea that rewarding yourself—for your promotion, for paying off a loan or for reaching a personal goal—will make you work even harder in the future. In other words, that reward is a positive reinforcement. Women, however, are notorious for rewarding themselves with sinful pleasures (a.k.a. self-destructors): mounds of chocolate, pounds of cheesecake and stacks of Oreos. Skinner might be shocked to know how literally we took him! Granted, the gratification of that chocolate cake is immediate and inexpensive, but it's short-lived—it's shelf-life is about two seconds after the last bite! What's rewarding about this? All those late nights at the office? All those miles you ran? Just for some chocolate? Have we found ourselves to be so impulsive that we've added weight so we wouldn't have to wait?

Instead, we need a reward that lasts. One that reminds us who we are and how we got here. Something tangible that we can look at throughout our day. Something that, by itself (without its neighboring pieces of pie), can reinforce our commitment to ourselves. Women have started replacing that donut with a right-hand ring. "Women of the world, raise your right hand!" is the slogan for the Diamond Promotion Service's (DPS) latest campaign. Those of us between the ages of 30 and 54 have discovered that the best way to reward ourselves is with jewelry we buy for ourselves. So is romance dead? Absolutely not. In fact what could be more romantic than your guy encouraging you to actually spend money on yourself? To go against your "nature to nurture?" To hear him say, "You deserve this. If it makes you feel good, you should wear one." It's a gift of love from yourself, for yourself.

So who are these women? They're proud, competent, confident and luminous. Sound like someone you know? Charles & Colvard's right-hand ring campaign (just one of several out there) says that this woman is "a self-purchaser who is identified as an upwardly mobile, working woman. Influenced by style, she is fashion conscious, an independent decision-maker, aspires to more and takes pride in her achievements—both personal and professional."

"I would buy any sort of ring that pleases me,
for any finger of either hand." —Jessica

Younger women who are still plowing their way through the work world, laughing at their paycheck, don't need to go for the ultra-expensive diamond right-hand ring. "My left hand is as free as my right" a friend said, "and so are my toes, my bellybutton and my nose." It can be the north/south oriented, diamond right-hand ring, or it can be a cool and funky ring, set with big stones and handmade by a local designer. It's simply something you like.

"Tell me what you think about me/
I buy my own diamonds and my own rings."
— from "Independent Woman" by Destiny's Child

So what do the guys think? "I don't see anything wrong with women buying their own jewelry, and I think most guys would agree. It's great for everyone involved. They get something they truly like, and we don't have to pay for it!"

Still need convincing? Certainly a recent accomplishment falls into at least one of the following:

• Promotion
• A new job
• Parenting milestone
• Reaching a goal
• Reclaiming your maiden name
• Empty nest at last!
• Graduation
• Putting down the cookie

"When I got a divorce, I bought myself the biggest sapphire ring
I could find. I bought another when I graduated from college.
I bought another just because I wanted to." —Patricia

You've worked hard—make your reward last. Set aside some money and take the time to find what you really like, something that will encourage you in the future. In the long run, a ring on your finger is less expensive than eliminating the tires around your waist!